Losing, facing failure, and experiencing disappointing outcomes suck royally. It doesn’t matter how much pep talk you give yourself. After being defeated, it hurts. If anything, it can deliver a big blow to your ego.
I’m sure we all heard, “It’s not winning that counts; it’s how you play the game.” Well, if you’re not playing an actual game, life can feel like a game sometimes. Then we’ve found our positive fix in this classic quote. Well, almost.
The truth in the quote is how we conduct ourselves as we play. Depending on our behavior, a certain result can attract back to us. This makes one’s conduct more valuable than actually winning. But we are talking about actually winning here, right? We want to win. It feels good and makes us feel alive. Winning makes us feel victoriously accomplished. However, when we lose, we are confronted with ourselves and our conduct more than ever.
That leads us to evaluation after a defeat, where we ask ourselves, “What went wrong?” We either cling to excuses, blame those who seem to be the victor, or drift into self-loathing. The feelings of defeat cause hurt. Our thought process becomes completely engrossed in our inner egos at that point. What we believe about ourselves takes center stage all the while failure stares directly into our faces. So what do we do now after we defeat them? A better question to ask is, Do you feel defeated?
The best solution for overcoming defeat can be summed up in one word: perception. Our perception shapes our reality in this world. How we come to understand the world around us determines our interaction with our environment and the people in it. When we experience any form of defeat, we face our perception. We also confront our beliefs or feelings about failure. Failure can become a valuable lesson. Alternatively, it can be the stumbling block that prevents us from believing in our success.
Of course, we have been defeated. Now we are left in the shadows. Perhaps we are even left out in the cold, shunned, passed up, or pushed aside. There is no easy way to put it. Experiencing failure can be heartbreaking. However, it can either make us or break us. The choice remains ours. What path shall we choose?
We can wallow in the past defeat. We can play the role of a loser and feel like one too. Alternatively, we can choose to continue trying with determination. We should believe and feel that we are winners, even if present external facts deny it. With that great assumption, we have already achieved our goal.
Furthermore, we can choose then with our perception to believe in ourselves and continue on being co-creators living and learning even if that gateway to success includes experiencing failure and defeat.
There is a quote by, Henry Ford, creator of the first automobile, that states, “Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.”
Henry Ford’s quote is meaningful because of the perception of failure described as a lesson that exists within his words. The chastisement of failure can lead to successful results if we don’t give up in trying. Henry Ford did not give up his pursuit to create a moving vehicle, and his efforts allowed for the technological innovations of the automobile that are so beloved by so many today.
Henry Ford isn’t the only innovative mind to grace this planet, offering his giftings in providing beneficial enhancement to the world. He joins so many other crafty souls that refused and are refusing to not give up after experiencing failure, and those names we always remember.
Sometimes after experiencing defeat, we are often left with asking ourselves, “What now?” The key word in that phrase is now. Now is the time to start again, to try again. It is in the now of time where we choose to either dwell on the past defeat, which is a moment that is gone, or live in the now, being present with it and creating from it. That in allowing ourselves to be present, a future that is not yet written is written by our present thought forms and feelings.
MightyMethods